The Happiness Spectrum – The Best & Worst Kinds Of Happiness Happiness Spectrum – Distinguishing pleasure versus gratification and understanding which forms of happiness you should be pursuing. The Ultimate Life Purpose Course – Create Your Dream Career: Leo’s Top 140 Self Help Books Previous Article Follow Your Dream Next Article Why Public Speaking is All About Building Trust (And How To Do It!)
Mindblowing! thank you!
Here's a meaningful thought from an ancient stoic philosopher :
"Almost nothing material is needed for a happy life, for the one who understands existence." — Marcus Aurelius.
hi leo , I watch already others video from you and I'm I kind of confuse about try to reach success or become a millionaire , how is possible that even you wanna reach this 2 things if you when talk about it you are saying that just pleasurable(hedonic )???
I mean I'm not point my finger to you , I just have a little bit of confusion about this.
Thank you, Leo. I listen to you everyday and it has changed mylife ever since. I have now scheduled a 10 day vipassana retreat. 🙂 anyone from the Philippines please? Kindly email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I want to keep in touch with same minded people. 🙂
Today I watched TV for about 15 minutes (I haven't had a very good day) and I could feel how hollow it was so I stopped. The same thing goes for social interactions, the people are boring and they wouldn't understand the depth of my life so I don't bother talking to them much if I can help it.
My validation from other people is mostly getting them off my back by doing their work for them.
I don't really want their validation, I just want them to stop getting in my way. Even if they don't know it, I always know if they actually want to help me and most of them don't.
Sex isn't a goal, it's more of a time waster. My unconscious self says "do this for a couple of hours and then you will be motivated and get more work done" I never see through the lie until it's too late.
Goes up and comes down lower! This is what makes you go back for more and it gets worse that's the only reason why I have at least 1 day a week where I get almost nothing important done!
My solid friends are the ones that are helping me because they are facing the some problems.
Learning every second (I'm always trying to)
I love every aspect of my work but other things get in the way (things that I don't want but are thrown on me) and the hours I tell myself I have to put in are quite scary at times.
I regularly get flow, every day for at least 1 hourlong period, sometimes 2 separate ones and 3 or 4 at least 1 day a week, leaving me feeling great. This is thanks to your working in block time video, the first one I ever watched and I could never repay you for it.
I already am who I should be, sometimes I just forget that.
I'm one of the few people that can have a completely shit day and still be kind to the people that matter.
The very reason I want to go further is because of my gratitude (aside from not having any other option) because I know I'm capable of even more.
I honour my commitments by working from midnight for 5 hours, even when I know that I have to get up at 6am. I tell myself I'm going to do something and then I do it 5 or 6 days a week instead of 7 (I'm getting better) but if I know I don't have time to waste, I will make any necessary sacrifice!
If it wasn't meaningful I wouldn't be doing it. Many people disagree with me but that's only because nothing bad has happened to them yet, which in turn, is only because I have been committed (at least enough to succeed so far)
In almost every video you mention the life purpose course at some point! While I'm already aware of my life purpose and it costs money (I'm not sure how much) if it's as good as you say (90+ hours of content) then I'm sure it will benefit many people.
I guessed enlightenment, which is the awareness of being so that counts.
Being is different to low consciousness (watching TV) I confirmed this today.
I'm feeling motivated again, like last time with my other big haul of comments. Unfortunately the 2 smaller ones I would have made (about 10 lines) both get deleted (I'm clumsy with technology) After this is done (hopefully my flow isn't interrupted) I'm going for another solid hour of work (maybe even 2)
It's not boring at all, I see it as no responsibilities for that time (woohoo) and a time to reevaluate my techniques and see if I can make them more effective, then I test them.
My 2 enlightenment experiences, while not obviously in the moment from other people's perspective, I knew I was and I enjoyed it. That's all that matters.
That sense of fulfilment I got that at the Gym a couple of times (my second home) and that one evening at a restaurant looking out at the sunset. It didn't matter that it was obstructed by buildings, because I still felt it. That one lasted more than 3 hours.
Doing it again. Talking about something before you do.
I get resistance, even though I know I should be working, my lower self says "a whole hour, doesn't it get boring" most days I just ignore it but sometimes it wins and I don't know why it's only then.
I do meditation for 30 minutes 2 days a week and it is difficult, especially when I know I'm behind in my work and it's all I can think about, but during that meditation, if I just stick with it, I find my solutions.
My whole life is about gratitude, contribution and being (at least that's my intention, which I live up to more than 90% of the time) and I'm realising that more. I grow every year even though I'm just doing what I love and thanks for helping me appreciate that.
Recently I have been training the next generation, Logan is doing great, he's a good kid and he wants to learn.
Thanks for everything Leo. Keep up the good work and I will too!
I love you, Leo
It's so interresting to see that society propagates the pleasure ones and shuns the gratification ones.
Awesome video! 🙂
I kinda hate, how Leo has truth always.
I am never disappointed in you. I am unbelievably depressed because I have spent my entire life as a fool, a hedonistic fool. But I am not dead yet.
I fell from the third end of the spectrum.to the first end because of people pleasing business.then when I had nothing left in the end I thought beauty ,boyfriends,money approval was going to make me happy.but I was truly rotting from inside when I tried to go after these. I agree with this video. Though what's wrong with beauty . Chasing it is definitely wrong . But I didn't care about it earlier and as a girl you have to suffer a lot if you don't look good.and then what's wrong with feeling good and making yourself feel attractive for yourself?
I argued with a friend on this topic I said money bring temporary happiness, he was saying no, money gives happiness because with money he can travel and travel makes him happy, with money he bought a boat and he has good time and he is happy there etc I said we are losing a lot of time running after money and that don't make us happy at all, we spend too much time earning those money with which we have a short happy period of life. If happiness is a state of mind, money can't buy it, that's my point of view, why people can't see this
but don't just demonize hedonic pleasure! explain technically that it is because of evolution and survival and without it animals and lifeforms wouldn't know what to do to survive and reproduce. Without hedonic pleasure no animals would have evolved into humans
i personally call pleasure and gratifikation fast and long pleasure
To be or not to be, that is the question…
the happiness around the christmas tree etc, it's not the act of 'being' that is the source of happiness. it is the moment where you forget your worries. it crosses my mind that humans are naturally happy. it is our most natural state to be happy and content. it is only when we start to worry that we become restless. and this is why we are also most happy when we are in a state of flow. any activity or phenomena that causes us to forget the worries, will result in us reverting to our natural state, that is happiness. you don't need enlightenment to be happy. you just need to be rid of worry and stress. this is why indigenous tribes are generally happy and content. you get the same story from people who go and live off the grid too.
It crosses my mind that all this work to reach enlightenment, it is all a game of lets pretend. it's a method to let go of worry. you convince yourself that nothing matters. (I know that on a fundamental level nothing matters, but things matter to us personally because we are programmed to survive.) But as I write this, I realise, that enlightenment is just another form of dogma. if this is taken away from somebody who really believes it is the answer, it creates cognitive dissonance and distress. so I don't expect anyone to listen to me, instead I will be labelled as somebody who is simply responding from 'ego defence'.
so it crosses my mind, that there is really nothing wrong with some of these so called 'bad happiness' things. for example, you can watch the tv as much as you like… so long as you exercise mindfulness and appreciation and gratitude. it's difficult to do that if you binge watch things, but so long as you exercise moderation, then you can strike a good balance. that could be more difficult if you watch things that have shock value and tend to disturb you on an emotional level. it would take a long time to recover from that, but more gentle and thoughtful tv can be very good. on a side note, i saw some clips of american news programmes. shocking stuff. I can't imagine how people can cope with that stuff. UK news is tame compared to that. I still avoid watching uk news though anyway. it is really negative and manipulative altogether.
perhaps you could classify these into groups similar to the following :- goal oriented, activity oriented, etc. the first group of things for example, it is useful to know why these things make you happy in a short duration of time and why you get this spike and then a trail off. for for drugs, you are pursuing the high, that is your goal, and then once you reach that goal, you have to deal with the comedown. this can be true of any goal oriented activity. the only way to avoid this phenomena is to avoid having any goals. perhaps an alternative, is to find a way to deal with the comedown after achieving any goal. I would expect that may be a system of reflection and appreciation. something that could be actively practised. I've been thinking about this a lot lately and it is similar in many ways to grieving. dealing with perceived loss.
it crosses my mind right now, all this talk about different qualities of happiness etc, these are all judgements. they are labels. why not just be content with any type of emotion and not label it or judge it? ha ha, I'm just funnin' with ya.
• Pleasure vs gradification – Hedonism vs Eudaimonia
• Pleasure: Drugs, food sex and exitement
• Gradification: – Living vuriously
○ Embodying your greatest strenghts, living up to them
○ Living a life of integrity and noble purpose
○ And living with higher conciousness and wisdom
• If you take all your activities, howmuch of them would be about Pleasure, vs virtue.. (Hedonism vs Eudaimonia)?
• In personal development, you would want to increase your Eudamonia, and decrease your level of Hedonism. That is what you are stiving for.
• Hedonism is very thrilling and exiting, only if you dont think long term. E.g. Good food, drugs, rollercoasters, promotions, vacations, sex etc.
• Eudimonic hapiness cannot be reached with any chemical. It also takes hard work and time. It does not come naturally and easily for most peapole.
• If you do the average stuff that most people do, then your goals will lean heavliy towards Hedonism.
• Eudimonic feelings are the fullfillment of strenght pride and nobility. You cannot buy that, and nothing can do that for you.
• Question your activities:
○ How long does the hapiness last (in duration)?
○ How much does it cost to produce?
○ What does it cost me long term, if I keep doing these activities again and again?
• Spectrum: From Hedonic to Eudaimonic, into 3 categories
• Aviod: – Addictive, Big spike that comes down and repetately always goes down lower.
○ Food, partying and drinking
○ Money – People who has money based goals, are the most unhappy and frustrated people.
○ Media and entertainment
○ Gossip and Idol socialization
○ Pursuing fame, status and "success"
○ Validation from other people
○ Porn and sex
○ Romantic enfactuation (chemical) – The first six months of a relationship.
• Moderately okay:
○ Physical exersize/growth (not to be confused with beauty)
○ Friendships and strong relationships (a couple of really solid friends is fulfilling in a sense)
○ Companionate love, (when the enfactuation wears off), you build a deeper bond with your partner.
• The best: – It all takes work, its not easy
○ Learning and education
○ Exellent work and flow states
○ Inner development and self acceptance – Therapy, meditaion, exersized, seminars, etc. Accepting yourself exacly as you are. – Liberation of neurosis
○ Kindness for others -Our brain is wired for us to develop kindness for other poeple.. Most of us have not figures out a way to integrate this into our lives.
○ Gratitude – If you are not grateful of what you already have, you will not be satisfied. – Negative visualisation.
○ Integrity – Are you living up to your greatest values? How good are you ar keeping your own commitments to yourself?
○ Contribution – What your work does for the betterment of humanity and the world. Its very satisfying
○ Being – Enlightenment. How to enjoy the moment of being. Being present.
§ E.g around the christmas tree when everything is winding down. You had a great day, and you feel like you dont need anything in the moment. You are fulfilled. We try to use all this nonsence to just put us into the right circumstances, just to get into this peace of being.
§ Or a sunset, where you are hiking. When you watch it, you have a sense of peace washed over you, because the sunset provided you an excuse just to be.
• Ask yourself: What are your goals for this year, and if they are Hedonic, how can I make them Eudimonic?
THANK YOU FOR CONTRIBUTING MY LIFE, LEO!
Thank you for another interesting video. I wish I knew this difference years ago when I was younger. I think such coaching should be thought at school so the road ahead of us would not be so difficult and filled with unanswered questions. I am very happy to have found your channel which brings more balance, more understanding and more clarity in my life and in my mind. Thank you.
Woah… Thrill seeking in hedonia …?
i am lucky that i have found you
Awesome talk I have already signed up on your website looking forward to 2018
Leo, this is a great video as always . Thank you for sharing this wisdom
thank you so much leo
thanks you leo !!!
Man this video prolly changed the trajectory of my life path … thanks Leo
im gratefull for my ps4 and this laptop.
Only 2nd or 3rd good video of yours. I can still take something away regardless that 90% of your stuff is dogmatic miss information and disinformation crap.
learning about 1third
Thanks again for your continued work Leo.. Great information right here and I am a huge fan of your mind, i cannot thank you enough.. The video itself is your eudaimonic happiness! Peace!
i like how you slightly smiled while wrapping up the video showing your happiness with what you do, sayng: "alright i'm signing off. this is leo from actualized.org". keep up the good work, you are inspiring milions of people, one of 'em being me…
Hey leo, i wondered whether you also reply on older videos like this?
Holy shit I have a 29 to 9 ratio. Got to improve!