Life is full of transitions. Change happens constantly, and sometimes when BIG changes hit, we can feel like we are stuck in the whirlwind of change without having any control over what’s going to happen. But the truth is, we have more control than we think:
1. First, acknowledge that the transition happened. “This is so important because so many people, if they are not happy with the change or don’t want it to happen, will simply ignore that it’s happening,” says Darryl Lovett, Creator and Host of Success in Black and White the Podcast. “This is detrimental to dealing with the change. When I transitioned from being a high school football god to a college red-shirt freshman, I was shell-shocked. I expected that just because I was great in high school, I’d be great in college. But it wasn’t like that, and I had a hard time dealing with that transition because I refused to acknowledge that I was at a transitional point in my life.”
2. Give yourself time to process the transition. “Something that Darryl and I have to communicate as a couple is that we handle transitions differently,” says April Lovett, Creator and Host of Success in Black and White the Podcast. “He tends to spend time reflecting on and processing a transition, whereas I tend to see it, accept it, and move forward as quickly as possible to get to the ‘other side’ of change,” she acknowledges. “There’s nothing that’s ‘bad’ or ‘good’ about one way of dealing with it over the other, but if you don’t understand how your partner handles transitions, your relationship will suffer as you try to make it through changes together.”
3. Be patient. “For me, this is the hardest part of working through transitions,” admits April. “But it’s my strong suit,” claims Darryl. “So as we work through change together, we also learn from each other,” says April. “It’s often me learning to be patient through his example. I’ve noticed since taking his cues and dealing with changes patiently that overall, the transitions don’t seem as bad or as daunting as they used to when I’d try to rush them along.”
Want more of this conversation? Tune in to Success in Black and White, The Podcast to hear Darryl & April’s conversation on “Surviving Transitions” (Episode 39).