Being “present in the moment” can be difficult to do; but current research shows that the happiest and most satisfied people have a hedonistic attitude towards the present; that is, they are most focused on experiencing pleasure in their current moment. Below are three ways to be more present:
1. Lay off of your past every now and then. “Everyone has a past,” says Darryl Lovett, Creator and Host of Success in Black and White, The Podcast. “You should remember it. You should take the lessons learned from it and apply them to your life. But it doesn’t mean you should dwell in it,” he says. “Dwelling in your past only holds you back from being in the present and planning for your future. Thinking too much about things that went wrong can hinder forward progress.”
“Additionally, don’t let others drag you back into the past,” says April Lovett, Creator and Host of the Success in Black and White Podcast. “This is especially true for couples. Couples who constantly throw the past in their partner’s face usually don’t last long,” she says.
2. Listen to your own voice. “In our business, we started achieving goals right away,” says Darryl. “But we got sidetracked when we listened to other people who wanted to have input. Some people were well-intentioned, some were just jealous. Regardless, because we listened to those opinions, we lost momentum on our goals for a while.”
“The lesson here is to listen to your own voice, to your own intuition, and know when other people’s opinions are valid and when they are only going to hold you back,” says April.
3. Understand how you experience being “in the moment”. “When I experience myself being totally and completely in the moment, those moments are micro-moments,” says April. “I was totally in the moment when we said our vows at our wedding. I was focused on the person standing right in front of me. The same thing on vacation; I found myself completely immersed in micro-moments, like watching my husband take my son to the ocean for the first time.”
“I’m different,” says Darryl. “I experience being present in the moment for long durations, or macro-moments. For instance, during our vacation, I was present the whole time. Which I know drove April a little crazy because as entrepreneurs, we still had to get work done. She’d ask me a question and I’d be like, ‘Do whatever’. That didn’t go over very well.”
Want more of this conversation? Tune in to Success in Black and White, The Podcast to hear Darryl & April’s conversation on “Embrace the Moment”